Monsters’ Ball: The Week’s Best Comments

Wait a second, wasn’t it just August, like, yesterday? Sorry, I know that is a total Conversation Topic for Dads. Every month, when Dads get their Official Newsletter, the first article is always an update on how no one can believe where the time goes any more than they could believe it last month. Next thing you know, I’m going to explain to you how when you are your age you think you have all the time in the world but you do not have all the time in the world, and that you will understand what I am talking about better when you are my age (55). But you will understand what I am talking about better when you are my age. Because where did all that time go?! Merry Huh-mas? Happy Whatdayisitmukah? Do you ever wish you had a universal remote FOR YOUR LIFE? Where are these guys when you need them?

Well, there is nothing to do but move forward. After the jump, the five Highest Rated comments as voted on by you, the Lowest Rated comment, and the Editor’s Choice.

This Week’s Highest Rated Comments


In regards to Forest Whitaker’s direction; I don’t think it’s fair to criticize a guy with a lazy eye for having a lack of vision.

Posted by: Frank Lloyd Wrong in response to The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Hope Floats
Score = 66

[Ed. note: Booo! Yayyyy!]


Ernest Goes to Camp, Saves Christmas, Goes to Jail, Gets Scared Stupid, Rides Again, Goes to School, Slam Dunks, Goes to Africa, and Joins the Army. Starring Jim Varney.

Posted by: dUb-iLL in response to Best New Party Game 13
Score = 68


An ode to diamond dust:

Posted by: incredimarc in response to The Sex And The City 2 Poster Is A Piece Of Crap
Score = 70


Well, as a racist and a supporter of Universal Heath Care I am offended.

Posted by: Mr. Hausfrau in response to Look At All Of These Racists!
Score = 70


Napoleon Dynamite starring John Heder

Posted by: Jeff in response to Best New Party Game 13
Score = 71

[Ed. note: the number one comment this week created quite a FIRESTORM this week. DS3M nearly had a meltdown (and nearly earned himself Lowest Rated Comment with one of his retorts). The thing is, I don’t even get it! Is the joke that Jeff doesn’t know how to play the game? Is that the joke? Or is the joke that there actually is some kind of secret commenterati cabal against DS3M and people were voting Jeff up just to prove some kind of point? Sometimes you guys make me a little bit nervous. This is how Shutter Islands start!]

This Week’s Lowest Rated Comment

well, the thing is, i think you’re being selfish. my intention is to desensitize the community-at-large so that charla can once again frolick freely among us without fear of scaring/grossing-out anyone. imagine how she feels. imagine hoe oprah felt, wiping the pre-cum from charla’s cheek. i think it’s better for us all to find a way to love charla as she is right now. she can’t just point and click a new face, ya know.

but really, i just want to be accepted, so i may have to consider your request.

Posted by: mangum in response to Saturday Night Live: Shy Ronnie, My Ninjas!
Score = -49

[Ed. note: Yikes! This was mangum’s first thread, and he or she clearly got off on one of the wrongest foots. And OK, I’m not sure that I buy into mangum’s false puffed-up stupid-on-purpose argument of only using an avatar that people found inappropriate in order to provide someone on Oprah with a better life (huh?). But the offending avatar in question, which I did not even see, has been replaced, and I get the sense that mangum seriously wants to be part of the club. And you have to admit that sometimes you guys can take some WARMING UP. So relax, technomonsters, and let’s see where this goes. Good luck, mangum!]

This Week’s Editor’s Choice

A. Always

B. Be

C. turning into Crows

Posted by: Josh Ya’ll in response to Fading Of The Cries Is Tommy Wiseau’s The Room But With Swords!

[Ed. note: LOLz are for closers.]