Good Luck On Criminal Minds Tonight, Gavin Rossdale!

Gavin Rossdale is going to be on Criminal Minds tonight, whatever that is. It could be anything. It’s probably a show for children about the magic of reading. Criminal Minds Rainbow. Anyway, Gavin (I call him Gavin) plays some kind of…goth…vampire…rock star…who might also be a goth vampire murderer? Perfect. It sounds like Gavin’s The Wrestler. All his life has been leading up to this one perfect role on a show for children about the magic of reading. And based on these preview clips, it looks like he’s going to do fine! Phew! Whenever I see someone like Gavin Rossdale from Glycerine doing a cameo in a movie or a TV show, I always feel like I’m watching a friend who had no prior interest in acting doing a cameo in a movie or a TV show. Like, I get really nervous for them, and then when they do a completely serviceable job reading the three stupid lines they have to read (“The last time I saw her was in the elevator, is she OK?”) I’m so proud of them. Not that Gavin Rossdale has any lines in these clips. Criminal Minds isn’t stupid! (I don’t think! There is no way to know whether or not Criminal Minds is stupid. Not until we figure out what Criminal Minds IS!) Anyway, good luck, Gavin Rossdale! It looks like you’re going to be very well-not-good-and-not-even-very-believable-but-at-least-not-embarrassing! So proud!

After the jump, you can be proud of Gavin Rossdale, too!

He’s doing it! He totally threw the ashtray at the mirror and then sat down and looked very goth and vampirey. “That is a wrap. Wrap party!” How come in the movies and TV when people get angry in dressing rooms they always throw something at the mirror, and then they go and sit right in front of that broken mirror? Always. Every time. Never mind. Some questions have no answers.

Oh, and here is Gavin Rossdale covering “Love Will Tear Us Apart,” because what else is a goth vampire murder suspect in 2009 going to cover?

Kind of silly but otherwise completely inoffensive acting won’t tear Gavin Rossdale apart…from this role!