Videogum

Monsters’ Ball: The Week’s Best Comments

Obviously, this week belongs to Bubble Boy. Obviously. “Personally, I think that the biggest story this week was Jamie Foxx weighing in on the Roman Polanski situation in Parade magazine.” No, you are wrong. It’s Bubble Boy. Bubble Boy all the bubble way. Although, if I had to pick a close second for the story that has gotten the most media attention, it would be the entries in the Videogum Kate Gosselin Halloween Costume Fan Fiction Contest. HUGE STORY. Just kidding, but you should go read them, they are really great. And Dafs’s winning entry in this week’s You Can Make It Up as well.

In more relevant, Monsters’ Ball news, today we bid goodbye to Da Cake Eatur in all of his many forms. Earlier this week he changed his name to Pistachio Disguisey, after he had already changed his name to Mayor Bee, Old Dude, WoW Rules 69, wha wha What?!, and a few others. You were warned, mister. So, now you are banned. For violation of the User Agreement. All of your comments are being deleted, and you will not be able to participate in the Videogum Commenting Community anymore. Bye bye, creep! One user name per user, you guys.

After the jump, the 5 Highest Rated comments, the Lowest Rated comment, and the Editor’s Choice.

This Week’s Highest Rated Comments

#5

The greatest trick that Falcon ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist.

Posted by: dUb-iLL in response to Uh, Now What?
Score = 41

#4

IRREGARDLESS!!!!!

Posted by: Dan S. in response to Sell The Vatican, Feed The World
Score = 41

#3

The boy is in the balloon next thing he knows he makes up on what appears to be fur, and James Gandolfini’s voice says, “I didn’t want to wake you up but i wanted to show you something.” Then some Arcade Fire started playing

Posted by: HarshBrowns in response to Uh, Now What?
Score = 42

#2

Well that’s to be expected when you put people named Gooch, Gerhls and Bumpus on a jet together.

Posted by: Paper Werewolf in response to Oprah Caught Up In Another Hilarious Lawsuit Involving Improbable Scenarios
Score = 44

#1

Posted by: That One in response to Who Should Die On TV?
Score = 53

[Ed. note: a true Monsters’ Ball this week, made up of monsters. Your highest rated comment is calling for the death of a human being! I mean, that is what this is, in its way. It’s tongue in cheek as a yuck-em-up answer to a goofball quiz about who should be killed off on TV, and we all agree that Glenn Beck is the worst, all of us, without a single exception agree upon that. But he should be allowed to live. I know that’s a weird thing for you guys to hear, but there is enough suffering and death in this world. Let’s throw this one back in the pond.]

This Week’s Lowest Rated Comment

Posted by: werttrew in response to Who Should Die On TV?
Score = -45

[Ed. note: see?! Even you guys are confused. I mean, obviously, we all love Andy Rooney with the same passion with which we hate Glenn Beck. But the joke is the same. To be fair to werttrew, he did apologize, so no harm done. Viva La Andy Rooney!]

This Week’s Editor’s Choice

#5

The best way to ward off a bully is to threaten to fuck them till they love you, faggot

Posted by: Mantasim in response to Videogum’s Teen Korner: Get Bully Smart

[Ed. note: you might think that telling young children to yell “I’m going to fuck you until you love me, faggot” at a bully in self-defense is bad, irresponsible “advice.” But surely it is no worse, and far safer in its way, then encouraging them to roundhouse elbow the bully in the face, smash his head into the cement, and jab him as hard as you can with the blunt end of a rolled up magazine? You know, because of how you guys were all saying that was such a good idea? And that you were going to use the BullySmart video to teach your own children? Don’t do that! Don’t do this either! Nevermind!]