Today Is Officially An Average Amount Of Megan Fox Day

Oh the Internet and its games. These old bones can hardly keep up! Last week, some website decided that yesterday, August 4th, would be “A Day Without Megan Fox” day, or something. I guess the idea was that they had developed Megan Foxtigue and they needed a super sexy break. Fair enough, I guess? I mean, I am pretty sure that every day can be A Day Without Megan Fox if you a) don’t know Megan Fox (which you don’t, no one does, I heard she was actually a computer simulation) and b) don’t read bikini websites like the website that made up this silly idea in the first place. The publicity for Transformers 2 is over, and I guess there are some stills for Jennifer’s Body floating around, but we should be able to manage. It’s not so bad! Sounds a little bit like the boner calling the boner a black boner, or whatever. Gross, and I’m sorry.

But then something else happened!

Another website that shares the first website’s belief that the future of popular culture will be built on a bedrock of photo galleries of women playing beer pong, went rogue, and declared a boycott on the boycott of Megan Fox. Ay-ay-ay! If any of this was real I would be so confused, but because it’s all just make-believe on blogs, I am DOUBLE CONFUSED.

And now a third website is claiming that the Day Without Megan Fox was scheduled for the wrong day?! OH NO! I barely even understood what it was in the first place and now we messed up!

But I guess today all of that is behind us. Today is officially An Average Amount of Megan Fox Day. Not too much Megan Fox, mind you, but not no Megan Fox either. Just as much as you might expect. I guess? I’m not sure how this works. Are we doing this right? Here she is on the set of her new movie, Terminator 5: Judgment Face. Get it? SHE LOOKS LIKE A MURDER ROBOT. A killbot, if you will. Better get out of the mattress store.