Videogum

Videogum’s Teen Korner: This Isn’t Your Dad’s Secret Of NIMH

Surf’s up, dudes and empowered grrrrls! Jonas Brothers! As you may have read in the Hollywood Reporter this morning (every teen’s go-to resource for da fresh entertainment gozzip), they are going to be making a new The Secret of NIMH movie, tentatively titled Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of NIMH. “What’s The Secret of NIMH?” you’re probably asking, as you ride your Razor Scooter over to Jamba Juice for an awesome, healthy snack. “Sounds gay.”

NO WAY DUDES, IT’S SUPER NOT GAY, AND WE DON’T CALL THINGS GAY ANYMORE, THAT’S NOT FRESH! MANDY MOORE!

The Secret of NIMH is an ancient movie (1982, pre-Pogs) that recounts the epic tale of a beleaguered family of field mice led by the widow, Mrs. Frisby (aka Brisby) beset on all sides by evil rats and murderous humans. X-BOX 360! But all of that is in the past, with skeletons and ghosts and your old rollerblades.

Check out the dizzope plot for the rizzemake:

Mrs. Brisby Bauer is a member of a covert intelligence operation called R.A.T. (Rad Action Team). She works as a hacker. Sick! She can get into any system. Her codename is “The Shadow.” One day she discovers that an evil rat from the Rat Taliban is going to try and commit a terrorist attack (if you’re 18, and a dude, don’t forget to send in your legally mandated registration for Selective Service! Doing your duty is dope!) on the cheese factory. She will only have 24 hours to use whatever tactics are necessary to get the information she needs. But Brisby Bauer’s got a secret weapon hidden up the Gore-Tex sleeve of her tactical uniform: she can rap.

Tell your parents to point their web browsers to http://wwww.fandango.com. Demi Lovato!