Brittny Gastineau Is Smarter Than She Looks (She Looks Zero Smart)

Just kidding. Brittny Gastineau looks just as smart as she is, which, again, to reiterate, is zero. Remember when she was acting (not acting) the fool in Bruno? Well that was all just a goof, you guys. Come on! It’s Brittny, bitch! Of course, she was totes in on its. From US Weekly*:

Brittny Gastineau says she was in on the joke when she appeared in Sacha Baron Cohen’s No. 1 comedy Bruno.

In the movie, Bruno interviews Gastineau, 26, and shows her a photo of a sonogram which he says is of Jamie Lynn Spears’ unborn fetus. He then asks her if the fetus looks deformed and if she thinks Spears should abort or keep it. “Abort it!” Gastineau replies.

“I was joking around,” Gastineau now tells “I was spoofing myself.”

Haha. She was spoofing herself, duh. I mean, sure, it seems like asking a lot of people to believe that you were interviewed saying horrible things in a movie whose whole premise is to catch people saying horrible things but that somehow you, out of all the people who got tricked in the movie, were smart enough to know that you were being tricked and just decided to say all that terrible stuff on your own steam, as a goof. Brittny Gastineau is obviously operating at a very high level.

Besides, she knew it was Sacha Baron Cohen the whole time!

When she was first asked to be interviewed by the faux Austrian journalist, “I didn’t know it was him.”


She says she was contacted because her E! show Gastineau Girls is broadcast in 54 different countries in Europe. “I was confused; I thought maybe it was still playing over there,” she says. “So I was like, ‘Ok.'”

“When I got there, I saw him, and I obviously knew it was him,” Gastineau tells Us. “I was like, ‘Oh, this is funny. This is a joke.’ I just went along with it.”

Totally! Just have fun! Talk about abortions and retards as a parody of yourself. I mean, when you think of Brittny Gastineau you think two things: 1. Class, and 2. Smarts. So it’s going to be pretty WILD for Brittny Gastineau fans** to see her this way. Classic Gastineau yuck-em-up.

She says her friends and family knew she was kidding as well.

I bet they did!

“Everyone knew I wasn’t serious when I said, ‘Abort a baby!'” she tells Us. “I was just playing along. Anyone who is going to see Bruno knows it’s a comedy, and I was totally joking around! I was not serious.”

Brittny, WE KNOW! Everyone in that movie was obviously just riffing on people’s pre-conceived notions of who they are. All the people at the MMA fight at the end were like “I screamed ‘Die you faggots’ as a gag. My mom won’t stop laughing.”

Brittny Gastineau, everybody. Summa Cum Laude of the Ashanti School of Parody***.

*Man, I am sorry, you guys, because I know that two US Weekly related posts in one day is A BILLION TOO MANY, but can I help it if they have all the best (worst) stuff?
**The Lochness Monsters of fans. (Mythological.)
***Eventually this website will become one impenetrable inside joke, completely impossible to understand, even for me.