You Could Be The Next Spokesperson For Carl’s Jr., Or You Could Keep Your Self-Respect

Oh boy. If nothing else, at least Carl’s Jr. kept the whole thing tasteful and classy. Wouldn’t you agree, hot chicks?

Sure. This is your chance to join the illustrious ranks of Paris Hilton and Audrina Patridge*. LIVING THE DREAM! Of course, the main difference will be that even though Paris Hilton and Audrina Patridge are equally talentless, plastic-faced hair-bots, they both have millions of dollars to console themselves in the dark night(s) of the soul that follows a decision like whether or not to be in a degrading and ridiculous Carl’s Jr. ad, and it’s not like they had any dignity to abandon anyway. You, on the other hand, will just have a handful of buy-one-get-one-free coupons and a stomach ache (from burgers). But whatever! “Famous.”

To be fair, though, this IS an opportunity to appear in an upcoming Carl’s Jr. or Hardee’s marketing campaign. They were not lying about that. This is that.

*And Padma Lakshmi, but I’m going to give her a walk on this one because of how her face looks pretty and Top Chef is good. But watch yourself, Lakshmi.