30 Rock: “The Black Widow Is Very Tuna”

On last night’s excellent 30 Rock, Jack learned that Elisa, Salma Hayek’s character and “The One,” had a dark secret: she killed her husband and earned the nickname “La Viuda Negra,” or The Black Widow. Also, everyone wore a Slanket, which internet nerds will remember was the original, but totally forgotten first version of the Snuggie. The Slanket people, forgotten by history and people’s money until now, will no doubt take great comfort in their 30 Rock (non) product placement, even if it was implied that the Slanket is filled with farts. Anyway, NBC made a real website for La Viuda Negra, and I translated it with babelfish, and it’s funny!

(Update: there’s a (quite obvious!) English translation button on the site that I missed because of…the site’s poor design, but does it say “tuna”? No, it says “pretty.” So babelfish is weirder and therefore better.):

The Black Widow is Elisa Padriera and she is met by to have killed her husband. She is a very jealous woman. It does not cross. She does not make his anger. She does not watch another woman. You do not speak about another woman. Cradled in the presence of the Black Widow he is better to pretend do not exist in another woman Earth. The Black Widow is very tuna and that is what his makes that so dangerous. When one is the Black Widow is better smile, the smile, but not too much or too much little. She does not touch unless it gives permission him. She does not take anything from her without his permission. Your heart does not forget its love yet all along or but.

Blue on green! (Via The Daily What.)

This episode was full of inside jokes, like: Kenneth says his real name is “Dick Whitman,” which is a name any Mad Men fan will immediately recognize, and we saw how the show used Tracy Morgan’s actual crazy-shirtless-appearance footage as his Tracy Morgan crazy-shirtless-appearance footage. So meta! You can watch the whole thing on Hulu, as always. Salma Hayek is gone for now, but upcoming guests this season include Alan Alda and Mary J. Blige!