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Ron Weasley Doing Mad Cocaine, Son

Rupert Grint, who plays Ron Weasley in the Harry Potter movies, is in a new movie about youth gone wild called Cherry Bomb, and this is that movie’s trailer, you guys:

This is just like that time Jaleel White shocked his fans with a movie about a mom and pop meth lab that faces some stiff competition when Mondo Meth opens up across the street. In your face, moms! Rupert Grint is so gully.

Also, I don’t want to sound like the 57-year-old man that I am, but why do all movies about adolescent coming-of-age now have to feature mainlining heroin, grand theft auto, and a double-dong? Since when did Requiem for a Dream replace Sixteen Candles as the standard for youthful self-discovery? Would you care for a Werther’s Original? Just pick the pocket lint off. And now if you’ll excuse me, I am late for my hip replacement surgery.