Just in time for belated Valentine’s Day: you and your sweetheart can have your names and faces inserted into a crappy falling-in-love montage on a DVD that looks like it was made as a high school group graphic design project. You and your loved one will want to watch your grainy faces pasted on the bodies of herky-jerky disco dancers, hot-air-balloon enthusiasts, and people who like to cuddle in the corn for some reason over and over for hours. And don’t worry about value, as the narrator says: “Your face and names are seen over fifty times!” Omg honey, we’re gonna be FAMOUS!:
As with Elizabeth Kubler-Ross’s stages of grief, a person watching this video goes through a series of ideas and emotions. The Personalized Love Story DVD Viewing Stages are different for each individual. Here were mine. Feel free to add your own:
1. Doesn’t it require less effort than this to be actually famous now?
2. Wait, hmmm, I kind of want one of these. Maybe the dude could be played by James Franco. I could put it on my blog!
3. They should have an “adult” version that they sell at Spencers! (Also with James Franco.)
4. Which couple that I know should I give this to as an engagement gift?
5. What if your personal love story involves breaking up and getting back together a bunch of times? Can that be on the DVD?
6. (Something terrible about Rihanna and Chris Brown.)
7. Wait, I’ve got it, this could be the ultimate embodiment of the That’s Your Girlfriend/That’s Your Boyfriend joke! Gabe frolicking in the corn with, I dunno, the Octomom. Shit yes.
Anyway, it’s only $29.95. Go nuts.