Kids Sing About Divorce And Bar Fighting The Darndest Things

Remember when Pink turned her sad, failed marriage to X-Games star Carey Hart into a fist-pumping bar rock anthem for people who think Chumbawumba’s “Tubthumping” is the godsong that the angels play on their lyres when you get to heaven? Now imagine if that same terrible, fist-pumping, adult-themed bar rock anthem was sung by children teasing the hormonal border of a sexually active adolesence. Now stop imagining it and start living it.

That’ll do, Kidz Bop. That’ll do.