The Reason :( Was Invented

If I could build a time machine, I would go back in time and KILL HITLER, but after that I would go back in time to just before the sad-face emoticon was invented and kill whoever invented it (because that’s the only way to stop him probably, better safe), not because the sad-face emoticon is bad but because it was premature. It’s all been leading up to this moment. We are standing on the shoulders of our Amistads and we are saying :(. We are saying :( so hard.