Duh Aficionado Magazine: Taylor Momsen Cannot Do Parkour

Did Nike bump its head or something? Because they could have made this ad with any celebrity. Angela Bassett for example. That woman from Spanglish who looks like Penelope Cruz but is not Penelope Cruz. It’s not like Taylor Momsen’s the only one who people would believe could actually do parkour or something. No one believes that. If anything she makes this ad even harder to accept because I don’t actually think that Taylor Momsen is surrounded by paparazzi when she leaves the gym. I feel that she can safely and comfortably get to her chauffeured (chauffeured because she’s 15, not because she’s famous) Land Rover without going all District B13. My guess is that Taylor Momsen’s days are pretty free from harassment, at least paparazzi-wise. The people crowding around her to tell her that Jenny Humphrey is one of the least likable characters on television and a dangerous cultural touchstone for teenage girls who are looking to pop culture for cues on what is appropriate behavior is another story. Then it’s all like “did you have to blow up the embassy, James?”