Videogum

It’s Third Eye Blind’s World, We Just Are Like “Huh?” In It

Earlier today, Vulture blog wrote a post about Nic Harcourt ending his show at KCRW, and ended with a toss-off joke about the merits, or lack thereof, of Third Eye Blind. This elicited a string of comments from a bunch of total 3EB Heads, who did not think the merits of Third Eye Blind were worth debating since the obvious answer was the merits of Third Eye Blind are that they are the best band in the history of bands. Fair enough.

But last month, Stereogum posted something sassy about Third Eye Blind’s new song (oh, btw, Third Eye Blind has a new song), inadvertently creating one of the most heated debates in site history. This led to a follow-up post in which 3EB’s lead singer, Stephan Jenkins, responded to the sass with a heartfelt explanation of the inspiration behind “Non-Dairy Creamer,” and that set off another round of fevered 3EB Heads shouting into the void. This is some Fringe “the pattern” type shit.

WHO ARE THESE THIRD EYE BLIND FANS, AND WHY DO THEY CONTROL THE INTERNET?

In the spirit of scientific discovery that has lead to innovations like bubble tea and shared dream state, I would like to test something out. Is it possible, using a single sentence, to draw every 3EB head in the world to a single source, causing the internet to implode like a dead sun beneath the weight of their inexplicable fanaticism?:

This is the worst music video of all time.