Videogum

The Worst Local News Report About Pubic Hair Dye EVER

Between Vodka Tampons, The ‘Beave Commercial, and this, it’s really becoming Vaginagum this week, but this local news report about a salon that uses that Betty dye to dye women’s hair “down there” was funny for too many reasons not to share:

Reason 1: “Some women are dying it red and green for the holidays.” Who? Why? Gross! That sounds like the pubic hair equivalent of a cakewreck. Specifically, this cakewreck (but with red.)

Reason 2: “We hear men love it in the shape of a heart.” If they can provide one man who will admit on camera to loving it in the shape of a heart, well, they’re going to have to pay an appearance fee, because the only man who would ever say that is the Peter Pan guy.

Reason 3: THE GRUNTING! It starts at 1:08. And then it builds. And then they use the same grunt from 1:08 over again? Like a sound effect? And then it’s just grunting and moaning all over the place until it finally, mercifully, ends? I think this TV station needs to be fined by the FCC. (Thanks, Sachar!)