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Historic Trash Talk: The Ultimate Fighter Edition, Part 4

One of the delights of reality TV, or the depressing sadnesses, depending on your particular outlook, is the extraordinary lengths that the contestants will go to express their intense disdain for their fellow competitors without coming to physical blows. Traditionally, a thrown punch, or even some lesser acts of physical aggression, result in the immediate disqualification and dismissal of the attacker. So reality show contestants will throw food in each other’s faces, or use harsh invectives. The puffed-up-chest posturing is also popular, and perhaps the favorite technique on every show lately is that if you want to hit someone you tauntingly demand that they hit you instead. All of this happened in last night’s episode of The Ultimate Fighter, except that our lead trash talker, Junie Browning, actually didn’t restrain himself at all. He threw a glass at someone, cutting their arm. He shoved people in the throat. He pulled someone into the pool. He demanded to kick everyone’s ass right then and there. And then, like last week, he broke down into tears. I really feel a lot of sympathy for Junie Browning, who seems like a young man struggling with a crushing load of rage issues and possible alcoholism, who also happens to be trained in the art of combat and physical harm. Whoops.

Normally, this would lead to Junie Browning getting kicked off the show, and that’s what it seemed was going to happen. But then it just didn’t. UFC President Dana White agreed to give Junie one more chance, and he tearfully thanked him and apologized to everyone in the house for his behavior. OK! Redemption. Forgiveness.

Except that within a matter of hours he was right back at it.

Oh, just to backtrack real quickly. The night of Junie’s nightmarish fightocaust, he had a partner in crime named Shane Nelson, who took off his shirt and threatened to punch holes in people’s faces. He, too, was almost kicked out of the house, but the condition of his being allowed to stay was that he had to be in the next fight. At which point Junie decided to work as his proxy trash talker, and began to talk trash on Shane’s behalf. Just to clarify, the guy who almost got kicked out of the house the night before decided to start some shit that was not even his shit to be starting. HISTORIC.

Hahaha. There is nothing better than a trash talker who is being dismissed and therefore not getting the reaction he wants having to rely on the “that’s right then” pouty walk off. The “that’s right then” pouty walk off is a bread and butter trash talk tactical move. The “that’s right then” pouty walk off is probably going to end up being the American policy towards Iraq.