The Amazing Pets Commercial: The Dirty Mind Test That Everybody Fails

Whoever was charged with the task of creating this commercial for stuffed animal children’s toys that lick and salivate on you when you pet them probably had a difficult job. But it’s impossible to believe that nobody in this company had the most basic human degree of dirty-mindedness (or even just common sense) to speak up before it was created. Do you know how many people are involved in commercials? Probably a lot, and they can’t all be Mormon:

My friend just now: “What year was this??”
Me: “Does it matter?”

It can’t be that old, because Love ‘N Licks pets are available at Sears. The official description:

When you pat their heads and rub their bellies, they respond to your love and attention by getting more and more excited. Their tails move faster, they kick their hind legs, and start to bark louder and louder. And when they are truly happy, they give you a big wet kiss!

This is what happens when we let Michael Jackson design toys.