90210 Tries To Make A Snappy Hills Reference, Fails

So last night on the new 90210, which yes, I know nobody cares about, there was this weird ad-libby scene where Ethan tells Annie about his emotional baggage and then he goes “I’ll save most of that for my audition for The Hills.” And then he goes on to riff about how he’s the next Spencer and he “can Spence anyone,” whatever that’s supposed to mean:

Sigh, oh 90210 writers, trying to do the Josh Schwartz thing. First off, there are no “auditions” for The Hills. Secondly, don’t let your actors make up their own pop-culture-referencing dialogue. There’s a reason they have writers for that shit, because witty repartee doesn’t exist in the world of high school in real life. And, thirdly, this entire exchange could have been written by my mom if you said “There’s a show called The Hills with a character named Spencer. Go!”