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Colin Hanks Keeps The Most Boring Secrets

Apparently Colin Hanks is directing a documentary. Fair enough. So, what’s his documentary about? Oh, it’s a secret? How intriguing! It’s probably about something really interesting. OOOOH WHAT COULD IT BE? Well, you no longer have to poop inside your pants because MTV Movies Blog has the EXCLUSIVE scoop:

He’s been hinting at it for months, but in every interview he’s done on the topic, Colin Hanks has refused to divulge the super-secret topic for his upcoming documentary.

Until now.

“I’m now able to say that it will be a documentary about the rise and fall of Tower Records which was started in 1960 in my hometown of Sacramento California,” the famous scion told MTV News.

Um, it’s a documentary about Tower Records? What’s his second documentary going to be about? A riveting account of how the 12 people who saw his Tower Records documentary died of boredom? I don’t even want to watch a 30-second YouTube video of Tower Records falling off a trampoline. Also, whoops, Colin Hanks, someone already made your documentary and it’s the worst thing ever. Can’t you get your dad to pull some strings and get you some better ideas.