Angelina Jolie Asks Her Best Adultfriendfinder For Advice

The New York Post has some interesting casting news this morning about the next Batman movie, and not a moment too soon! That movie’s not coming out for a billion years, there’s no script yet, and we’re still embroiled in wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. Who’s going to play Catwoman?

NOW that Angelina Jolie has the blessing of original Catwoman Julie Newmar to play the foxy feline in the next “Batman” movie, she’s been talking it over with porn star Tera Patrick . “They are friends and keep in touch via e-mail,” said a source. “She and Angie have a girl-talk thing going. After seeing reports that she’ll land the lead role, Jolie asked Patrick what she thought. Tera had such insights into the role that Jolie cracked, ‘You should do it!’ ” Jolie’s rep did not return calls.

The idea that Angelina Jolie might play Catwoman is not what’s interesting about this news. At this point I think Angelina Jolie is considered for every role. Paul Giamatti only got John Adams because Jolie’s schedule was too crowded. What’s interesting about this news is everything that’s not being reported. When did Angelina Jolie become friends with Tera Patrick? At the Knife Play Convention? But they only communicate over email? Where was Angelina Jolie “seeing reports” that she’ll land the lead role? Livejournal? But most importantly, why on Earth did she ask Patrick what she thought? “Hey, Porny, what do you think about the rampant, potentially baseless speculation that I’m going to play a character in the follow up to the third-highest grossing movie of all time? Should I do it? You’re great at making decisions in your life, why don’t you tell me? Good move?” Also what were Tera’s insights? “You should definitely wear a butt plug the whole time. I find it really helps me remember my three lines. What do you mean there are going to be more than three lines?” This story is basically season 5 of Lost. MYSTERIES!