What Has Two Thumbs And Won’t Be Seeing Frank Miller’s The Spirit

Hint: it’s this guy. This trailer is a couple days old, but I was fulfilling my civic duty, so relax. Anyway, I have some really bad news for people who were looking forward to Frank Miller’s The Spirit. The bad news is that it’s going to be like this:

Yikes. It’s like a combination of What Women Want and Hudson Hawk in the style of an Herbal Essences commercial that tried to mimic the cinematography from Sin City but they could only afford a graphic artist who’d finished his first semester at the local vocational school and whose professional experience was primarily in designing mortgage refinancing banner ads for the internet. I’m going to write my own graphic novel called DO NOT WANT. It’s going to be so mundane and melancholic that Chris Ware will retire.