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Quinton “Rampage” Jackson Is The Undisputed Champion Of Going To Jail

UFC fighter Rampage Jackson was arrested yesterday after what journalists can’t stop smirkily calling “a rampage.” Get it? We might run out of Pulitzers this year. From Sports Illustrated:

A patrol officer attempted to pull Jackson over after he was seen weaving in and out of traffic with a flat front left tire, according to a release issued by the Costa Mesa Police Department. Jackson, 30, continued driving to avoid being stopped. Losing control of the truck, Jackson drove up onto a sidewalk. He continued on, colliding with a vehicle in an intersection and running several red lights.

In a sport with as many turbo-meatheads as MMA, it would normally be hard to pick out the worst one. It’s like finding a needle filled with steroids in a stack of protein shakes. But after Alex Blagg interviewed Jackson for Best Week Ever and was swiftly suplexed, I have hated this man. I believe in sportsmanship, and I believe in not smacking people in the face. Those are my two beliefs. Oh, and that A.D. Miles should have his own TV show. So my three beliefs.

That guy is the heavyweight champion of being an asshole. He’s already posted bail and is out on the streets, picking on people who don’t know how to ultimate fight, and not getting jokes ever. I’m glad that he SPOILER ALERT lost his fight to Forest Griffin two weeks ago. I hope it’s all down hill for him and that he ends up in Superjail. Jerk.