I was born in the late ’70s, so I didn’t experience the hyper-violent, openly sexual film of that decade first hand. I missed out on the low budget exploitation and the winking social satire. It wasn’t until years later in elementary school that I started catching up with the Easy Riders and Taxi Drivers of the past. I totally understand why these films were influential, and how they wrested the power away from Hollywood and put it into the hands of free-spirited artists who wanted to get at a human truth beyond Roman-era epics and Busby Berkley musicals (which were all made in the ’70s, don’t be fooled by facts). But even without experiencing those things in the weather-beaten seats of a cum-stained Times Square movie theater, these Grindhouse-style b-movie revival projects depress the shit out of me.
Hell Ride red band trailer after the jump, you guys.
Quentin Tarantino executive produced it, NATURALLY. That vampire bully will not rest (in the coffin that he uses for a bed because he is a vampire as mentioned) until he sucks (because he is a vampire with a vampire face) all the pleasure out of film’s long and changing history. At some point he’s just going to make a film with a three and a half year running time that combines every single cinematic trope, which other directors actually had to use their creativity to come up with, and at the end he’s going to toss his lighter onto a trail of gasoline that leads to Hollywood and give us all the finger as he descends into his bamboo-lined Boom Boom Fortress on the outskirts of a Las Vegas he doesn’t realize is not half as sleazy as he wishes it was, to spend the rest of his days whittling away the hard edges of his nose with a pocket knife and remembering how things were simpler when he worked at a video store and no one knew him well enough to hate him.