Fake TV Does Not Protect Your Home From Hamburglars

Have you ever wanted to leave your house, but been too afraid to because you knew that a burglar with a crowbar would burgle it of all your stuff? FEAR NO MORE. Now, with Fake TV, you can fool burglars and other crooks into thinking that you are home watching television.

It’s unsettling to learn that burglars also think in poorly drawn cartoons. That must be why they’re so good at crime, because they think just like us. Man, Fake TV, you guys. So much smarter than just leaving on your real TV, and/or some lights. Very very solid idea. And this is not a cheap product that simulates the flicker of a cathode-ray television, this is simulates a REAL LCD HDTV, guys. I think the guy who invented this went to MIT, or is President of MIT or something. Here are all of the reasons (real) to buy Fake TV, from the Fake TV website:

* Dynamic and convincing occupancy simulation
* Computer controlled, super-bright multi-color LED Light output equivalent to a typical 27″ TV
* Consumes just the power a night-light. AC adapter included
* Most televisions turn on with push buttons and do not work with timers. Burglars know this, making FakeTV very effective!
* Built in light sensor turns FakeTV on each evening at dusk. Turns off automatically

“Better skip this house, Jake, looks like someone’s watching a 27″ LCD HDTV in there. There’s no way someone could simulate such dynamic and convincing occupancy.” That was me impersonating a criminal. Spooky, right? Can you believe that this thing comes with its own AC Adapter? It basically pays for itself at that point. I also love that burglars know that TVs do not work on timers, but what they don’t realize is that all televisions turn on automatically at dusk, so the ruse is yours to play. The website also offers a product called RainTracker which will turn on the windshield wipers in your car if your windshield gets wet, perfect for people who are tired of using their eyes while driving.