The Real World Producers Only Want What’s Worst For Everyone

We’re only three episodes into the new season of the Real World, and already someone wants out. After last week’s drinking episode, Joey continues to tear himself a new asshole at the club, only to come home and kill a six pack of cold brews and a two liter bottle of white wine. That’s when he packs his suitcase and threatens to beat the shit out of the girls in the house. That kid has more class in his sideburns than Sonic The Hedgehog has in his whole stupid body (do the math).

Alcoholism is a disease, and it should be treated as such, which is why this interaction between Joey and some Real World producers is, to say the least, super gross:

Yeah, Joey, just go to rehab for 30 days and then come back to the house. That’s a really smart idea. Everyone’s just worried about you, and hoping that you’ll move back into the house. Your borderline psychotic break under the influence of alcohol, which you had managed to avoid before being placed in a situation in which adults provide children with alcohol in order to boost the ratings, is simply evidence of the fact that you belong in the house. You’re going to have to get better, of course, but when you do get better, which will only take 30 days, it’s foolproof, then come on back to the house and have your life taped to find out what really happens when you stop being polite and keep blacking out in a way that’s extremely dangerous to your health and the health of those around you, but makes for great television.