Flavor Flav Is A Bad Ambassador

I was really getting worried about Flavor of Love last night (nullus). It’s down to the final three, and by reality TV law, this means there must be one villain and/or sexpot, and one true love and/or shy girl. Those are the laws. I did not write them, but I live by them. But with Sinceer, Seezinz, and Black, there was no one to root for or against. Who cares about these women? Not America. Luckily, and if such a thing as a SPOILER ALERT exists for this show this is one, Flav brought back Thing 2, who I genuinely like. She is nice. She’s age appropriate. She’s pretty but she’s not that pretty. If we’re going to have a charade of a courtship, let’s at least have it be a halfway convincing charade.

But more importantly, I have a request for the President of Entertainment (or maybe just the President of VH1). Can we please stop with the romantic reality show xenophobia? Every season, we get taken to an exotic locale where clownish buffoons act like foul-mouthed box car children. I’m pretty sure we should focus our energies on repairing our national image in the face of the War in Iraq before we start “making fun of ourselves” in this way.

Cheese is stinky. Foreign names are weird. Fart it or leave it.