Wii Fat

Have you guys heard about Wii Fit? It’s a “game” coming out May 21st from Nintendo that will make “exercise” “fun.” It’s already been released in England&#151where everyone is disgustingly fat—and Japan, and it’s doing great. People love to play games and get healthy. Except that they don’t. Wasn’t this already a game called Nintendo Power Pad? I did not have a Nintendo as a child, because my parents believed in hating me, but I knew kids who had them, and they were all really, really smart at cheating at Nintendo Power Pad. Some of them used their hands (the fattest of my friends), and others would master the long jump by just stepping off of the Pad at the exact right moment and just standing there, gaining weight while the on-screen athlete did all the work.

So, Wii Fit comes with a Power balance board. One can only imagine how great the newest generation of fat kids will be at avoiding actually using this.

Here, a child has tricked the Nintendo into thinking that this pile of candy and cheeseburgers is a human being exercising.