Jacko Writes Hurricane Song, Lifts Weights

Michael Jackson is planning to record a charity single “From The Bottom Of My Heart,” to aid victims of Hurricane Katrina. Here are the details via MTV, not The Onion:

Since Jackson’s been camped out in the Arabian Gulf in the aftermath of his child-molestation trial, and since he plans to release the song on a label owned by a prince in Bahrain, he’s calling the project “From the Gulf to the Gulf.” … He plans to reach out to other recording artists in the next 24 hours to sing along.

Never mind the fact that Jackson’s 9/11 charity single — “What More Can I Give” — was never actually released. Will this be our first glimpse of the new-and-improved Macho Jackson? “Besides lifting weights, Jacko plans to wear shorter wigs, less make-up, and generally try to look less of a freak.”