Human beings are inherently selfish. We just go about our business, living out our small little lives, always thinking about ourselves, never stopping to consider how music legend Bob Dylan is doing. Is Bob Dylan okay? Is he tired? Does he maybe want a brand new Sleep Number adjustable bed?
Fortunately, heroes do exist, and the good people at The Onion sister site ClickHole decided to stand up and give something back to Bob Dylan for a change. Two weeks ago, they launched a GoFundMe campaign to buy Bob Dylan a brand new Sleep Number adjustable bed. As the page explains:
For over 50 years, Bob Dylan has been one of the most celebrated figures in American music. His songs have redefined genres and given voice to generations, and he has continued to crank out tune after awesome tune well into his winter years. He has given us everything while asking nothing in return, and for that, we think it’s about time that America said “thank you” for all his contributions to our ears and our hearts.
Hence, we have started this GoFundMe page with the goal of purchasing Bob a brand-new Sleep Number® adjustable bed. This includes a classic c2 Sleep Number® mattress, a sturdy modular base, and an intuitive wireless remote for adjusting the bed’s firmness. With taxes and shipping, the bed will cost $1,359.97. It is expensive, but we believe that this is the least we can do to thank “The Man In The Hat” for his service to the American people.
They quickly exceeded their goal of $1360 by a couple hundred bucks, and now they’re following through as promised. The bed has been purchased and shipped is currently en route to the Columbia Records headquarters in New York, along with a personalized “Hi Bob” remote control. A Bob Dylan-themed duvet cover that they bought with the extra funds has reportedly already arrived. Check out a few pics below.
UPDATE: ClickHole reports that the bed has arrived safely at Columbia Records. Huzzah!