It’s been about two and a half years since Kesha accused her former producer and label boss Dr. Luke of sexual and emotional abuse, and her legal battle against the man, and against the contract in which she’s trapped, seems to be neverending. But Kesha has also been working on herself. And in a new essay for Teen Vogue, she writes about battling an eating disorder, and about the intense body-image issues that can come from being famous and from seeing your own picture all the time. Here’s a piece of that essay:
When I think about the kind of bullying I dealt with as a child and teen, it seems almost quaint compared with what goes on today. The amount of body-shaming and baseless slut-shaming online makes me sick. I know from personal experience how comments can mess up somebody’s self-confidence and sense of self-worth. I have felt so unlovable after reading cruel words written by strangers who don’t know a thing about me.
It became a vicious cycle: When I compared myself to others, I would read more mean comments, which only fed my anxiety and depression. Seeing paparazzi photos of myself and the accompanying catty commentary fueled my eating disorder. The sick irony was that when I was at some of the lowest points in my life, I kept hearing how much better I looked. I knew I was destroying my body with my eating disorder, but the message I was getting was that I was doing great.
She also mentions that she’s working on addressing these issues in the new music that she’s making: “I’m currently writing an album that explores how my vulnerabilities are a strength, not a weakness.” You can read the whole piece here.