Temporarily Useless vs. Permanently Weird

“If a woman has something implanted permanently, it might as well do something useful.”

What is this man talking about?

  1. Caffeinated Depo-Provera
  2. K-Fed’s degree in VCR repair
  3. Breast-based MP3 player
  4. Cellphone headset earring
  5. Preparation-H shampoo for Harriet Miers

Give up?

(thanks to Krist for the tip!)