Sounding Board

Amusing Posts From The Coachella Subreddit

Coachella, like most major American music festivals, has its very own subsection on Reddit where concertgoers can stay in touch about their ‘Chella experience. Like Coachella itself, visiting the Coachella subreddit is quite an experience.

The fest’s second weekend kicks off today, and as of this morning, the r/Coachella mostly comprises people complaining about the clusterfuck that was last night’s camping setup. Coachella delayed the opening of the campgrounds due to a severe high wind warning from the National Weather Service. Thus, folks were waiting in line for hours trying to make their way onto the festival grounds, some of them not even setting up their tents until sunrise. This sounds genuinely distressing.

Yet amongst all the serious business and logistical stuff, there’s a bunch of hilarious bullshit. Here is some of that hilarious bullshit.

Can I bring a quill and ink into the festival for my journal?

Some choice responses:

  • “Got a tobacco pipe, a monocle and a wax tip mustache too?”
  • “No, type writers only”
  • “How about your unicycle?”
  • “Jesus Christ”

Desperate woman seeks lost bandana

This poor lady lost her official Coachella-branded bandana, ruining her collection of Coachella-branded bandanas. All she wants is her bandana back. She’ll even pay you for your Coachella-branded bandana, provided you purchased the same one as her. This shit is bandanas! B-A-N-D-A-N-A-S. Fortunately, there is an online merch store where you can stock up on sick Coachella 2018 gear. Alas, a twist of both the plot and the dagger: The online emporium does not sell bandanas, only shirts and sweaters. Thwarted! If you’ve seen this woman’s bandana, please get in touch.

Anyone take a picture with my parasol? Lots of people approached me and realized this is the only picture I have from the whole weekend :’(. Doesn’t matter if I’m not in the picture. Just trying to see how many people I made happy with the parasol :)

It’s just a light-up parasol, guy.

who do i have to blow to have someone bring me a mcchicken on monroe?

Top response: “Ronald McDonald?”

Yoooo WALMARTCHELLA fam.. anyone tryna send a beer bong at the light house Hill in lot 4?

This thread refers to last night’s parking debacle, which involved making campers wait in a Walmart parking lot for hours beyond midnight. Sadly, no one responded.

When you can’t make Beychella because you have a 2 year old and more on the way (from my friend’s IG)

This one’s cute.

CAPTAIN SAVEAHOE EN ROUTE

The captain continues: “In a black taco, sunglasses on, speaker fully charged, Coors prepared for crackage, solo cups ready for its guts to be filled, krabby patties ready for flippage.” Honestly, that sounds pretty good. I wish I was with Captain Saveahoe right now.

Thank you, Milk Man (W1)

Some dude in a milk carton costume bought ferris wheel tickets for a whole group of people and rode with them. Super generous or super sketchy? Hard to say without seeing his facial hair situation. Play us out, Deerhoof!

Tags: Coachella, Reddit