On Friday, Tool frontman Maynard James Keenan’s other band a Perfect Circle returned with Eat The Elephant, their first album in 14 years. For this band to reactivate after lying dormant so long, you’d think they’d have some really important things to say, right? Well, they do. And one of those things is: Fuck Yelp.
Keenan owns Caduceus Cellars, a winery in Arizona. And as he puts it in this Stuff profile, the single “Disillusioned” — the one with the lyrics about “time to put the silicone obsession down” — is partially inspired by negative Yelp reviews of Caduceus. Here’s how he puts it:
That thing is fucking poison! Sites like Yelp have fostered this generation of novice experts who have the power to open their mouths but haven’t actually put the work into knowing what they’re talking about. I’ve had bad Yelp reviews of my tasting room, but it had nothing to do with the wine. The reviews were bad merely because I wasn’t there! That’s like giving my record a bad review because I wasn’t in the record store when they bought it! I can only say to those people: shut the fuck up!
Note: Caduceus seems to mostly get pretty good Yelp reviews (especially from long-winded Tool fans), and most of the bad reviews seem to to mostly be about how “the hipster staff has some attitude.”