We Regret To Inform You That Biffy Clyro Covered “WAP”

We Regret To Inform You That Biffy Clyro Covered “WAP”

About a month ago, Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion released the forcefully raunchy song “WAP.” It was an immediate smash, which is good, since it’s great. But one predictable side effect of the “WAP” explosion is that we will now face an onslaught of ironic “WAP” covers. The first version of this was roots-country star Margo Price singing “WAP” as an acoustic folk song on The Daily Show. That one was way better than it had to be, partly since Price managed to keep a straight face. But the new Biffy Clyro cover? There’s no good way to spin this one. It’s a fucking disaster.

Biffy Clyro, the Scottish rock band that’s been headlining UK festivals for years, debuted their “WAP” cover during a recent visit to the BBC Live Lounge. Their version of the song is a sort of smirky noise-rock thing. The central joke is that frontman Simon Neil, looking entirely too pleased with himself, lightly tweaks the lyrics so that it’s about Biffy Clyro and not about wet vaginas.

So: “If you’re not wet-ass Biffy, then your riffin’ game weak.” Also: “If you don’t riff, then you can’t Biff/ You can’t hurt my feelings because I like this.” On the intro, the members of the band chant, “There’s some Biff in this house.” If you would like to subject yourself to dangerous levels of annoyance, you can watch the video below.

Everybody else: Please don’t do this.

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