Eugene Mirman Offers $100k For 20 Minute GN’R Reunion

From the new Paste:

EUGENE MIRMAN: My first concert was Guns N’ Roses opening for Aerosmith. It was awesome. I was in eighth grade. My brother took me. Could you imagine being 1,000 feet from Axl Rose and later Joey Kramer?! The best part? I got water in my knee and spent the next day in the hospital in surgery. (They cut my knee and drained it! Plus there was a med student who for 20 minutes kept missing the vein in my arm with the IV. She poked a lot of holes in me.) Still, thanks, Ilya (my brother), Axl, Slash, Mr. Tyler, Joe Perry and the rest of the gang for rocking so hard. I hereby offer $100,000 (an amount I don’t have) if Guns N’ Roses re-forms (with or without Steven Adler) and plays on SPIKE TV for 20 minutes.”

How about it Axl? That Botox isn’t paying for itself.

If you’re not busy uploading MasterCard’s MacGyver Super Bowl commercial to YouTube, you can catch Eugene in the flesh this Sunday night. He’ll be performing with Stereogum-fave Demetri Martin and a bunch of bands at something called the Banana Milkshake Fund-Raiser.

Otherwise, hit eugenemirman.com to hear the Marvelous Crooning Child sing Twisted Sister and the Pixies.