List

AOL’s 111 Wussiest Songs Of All Time

Earlier this month we look at Blender’s 25 Biggest Wusses in music. Now America Online’s followed up with a list of the 111 Wussiest Songs Of All Time.

I’m proud to have dozens of these songs on my iPod, but I assume AOL’s not claiming all these songs are bad. Just wussy. So I think they did a pretty good job. Solid range of eras and genres too.

But what’s the point of a list you can’t argue about? The ‘Mats, AOL? Really?

111. ‘Do I Make You Proud’ – Taylor Hicks (2006)
110. ‘Seasons in the Sun’ – Terry Jacks (1974)
109. ‘Kiss Me’ – Sixpence None the Richer (1999)
108. ‘Wonderful Tonight’ – Eric Clapton (1977)
107. ‘What Hurts the Most’ – Rascal Flatts (2006)
106. ‘Break Up to Make Up’ – The Stylistics (1973)
105. ‘First Day of My Life’ – Bright Eyes (2005)
104. ‘Dancing in the Dark’ – Bruce Springsteen (1984)
103. ‘Daydream Believer’ – The Monkees (1968)
102. ‘People Are People’ – Depeche Mode (2006)
101. ‘I’m Into Something Good’ – Herman’s Hermits (1964)
100. ‘(I Just) Died in Your Arms Tonight’ – Cutting Crew (1986)
99. ‘Don’t Cry’ – Guns N’ Roses (1991)
98. ‘Against All Odds’ – Phil Collins (1984)
97. ‘Butterfly’ – Weezer (1996)
96. ‘I’m Not in Love’ – 10CC (1975)
95. ‘Hero’ – Enrique Iglesias (2001)
94. ‘Silly Love Songs’ – Paul McCartney (1976)
93. ‘Skyway’ – Replacements (1987)
92. ‘Mandy’ – Barry Manilow (1974)
91. ‘Angel’ – Shaggy (2000)
90. ‘Oh L’Amour’ – Erasure (1986)
89. ‘I Honestly Love You’ – Olivia Newton-John (1975)
88. ‘I Knew I Loved You’ – Savage Garden (1999)
87. ‘Open Arms’ – Journey (1982)
86. ‘Don’t Take the Girl’ – Tim McGraw (1994)
85. ‘Hey There Lonely Girl’ – Eddie Holman (1970)
84. ‘Crash’ – Dave Matthews Band (1996)
83. ‘You’re the Inspiration’ – Chicago (1984)
82. ‘I’m Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman’ – Britney Spears (2001)
81. ‘On and On’ – Stephen Bishop (1977)
80. ‘Friday I’m in Love’ – The Cure (1992)
79. ‘The River’ – Garth Brooks (1991)
78. ‘Lovin’ You’ – Minnie Ripperton (1975)
77. ‘Scarborough Fair’ – Simon & Garfunkel (1968)
76. ‘To Be With You’ – Mr. Big (1991)
75. ‘I Need Love’ – LL Cool J (1987)
74. ‘I Want To Know What Love Is’ – Foreigner (1984)
73. ‘I Do (Cherish You)’ – 98 Degrees (1998)
72. ‘I’ll Make Love To You’ – Boyz II Men (1994)
71. ‘Iris’ – Goo Goo Dolls (1998)
70. ‘Crying in the Chapel’ – The Orioles (1953)
69. ‘You Had Me From Hello’ – Kenny Chesney (1999)
68. ‘Let Me Hold You’ – Bow Wow (2005)
67. ‘Kites Are Fun’ – The Free Design (1967)
66. ‘Burn’ – Usher (2004)
65. ‘Our House’ – Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young (1970)
64. ‘I Just Called To Say I Love You’- Stevie Wonder (1984)
63. ‘Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want’ – The Smiths (1984)
62. ‘Time in a Bottle’ – Jim Croce (1973)
61. ‘Babe’ – Styx (1979)
60. ‘Too Shy’ (1983)
59. ‘Someone Saved My Life Tonight’ (1975)
58. ‘Bad Day’ – Daniel Powter (2005)
57. ‘She Believes In Me’ – Kenny Rogers (1979)
56. ‘Vindicated’ – Dashboard Confessional (2004)
55. ‘(Everything I Do) I Do It for You’ – Bryan Adams (1991)
54. ‘Leaving on a Jet Plane’ – Peter Paul and Mary (1969)
53. ‘2 Become 1′ – Spice Girls (1996)
52. ‘How Deep Is Your Love’ – Bee Gees (1977)
51. ‘Tutti Frutti’ – Pat Boone (1956)

50. ‘I’m in You’ – Peter Frampton (1977)
49. ‘Hero’ – Mariah Carey (1993)
48. ‘Just the Way You Are’ – Billy Joel (1977)
47. ‘Puppy Love’ – Donny Osmond (1972)
46. ‘Hip to Be Square’ – Huey Lewis (1986)
45. ‘Don’t Give Up On Us’ – David Soul (1976)
44. ‘Invisible’ – Clay Aiken (2003)
43. ‘Annie’s Song’ – John Denver (1974)
42. ‘When I’m 64′ – The Beatles (1967)
41. ‘You’ve Got a Friend’ – James Taylor (1971)
40. ‘God Must Have Spent a Little More Time on You’ – *NSYNC (1974) [I think they mean 1998.]
39. ‘With Arms Wide Open’ – Creed (2000)
38. ‘Alone Again (Naturally)’ – Gilbert O’ Sullivan (1972)
37. ‘So Sick’ – Ne-Yo (2006)
36. ‘Beth’ – Kiss (1976)
35. ‘She’s Like the Wind’ – Patrick Swayze (1987)
34. ‘I’ll Be Missing You’ – Puff Daddy and The Family (1997)
33. ‘My Heart Will Go On’ – Celine Dion (1997)
32. ‘Think of Laura’ – Christopher Cross (1982)
31. ‘Let Her In’ – John Travolta (1976)
30. ‘Walking on Sunshine’ – Katrina and the Waves (1983)
29. ‘Muskrat Love’ – America (1976)
28. ‘Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go’ – Wham (1984)
27. ‘More Than Words’ – Extreme (1991)
26. ‘Precious and Few’ – Climax (1972)
25. ‘Superman (It’s Not Easy)’ – Five for Fighting (2001)
24. ‘All Outta Love’ – Air Supply (1980)
23. ‘Your Body Is a Wonderland’ – John Mayer (2001)
22. ‘You Light Up My Life’ – Debbie Boone (1997)
21. ‘True’ – Spandau Ballet (1983)
20. ‘Such Great Heights’ – Iron and Wine (2003)
19. ‘Right Here Waiting’ – Richard Marx (1989)
18. ‘I Believe I Can Fly’ – R. Kelly (1996)
17. ‘Close To You’ – Carpenters (1970)
16. ‘All By Myself’ – Eric Carmen (1976)
15. ‘Cry’ – Johnny Ray (1951)
14. ‘Dear Mama’ – Tupac (1995)
13. ‘You Don’t Bring Me Flowers’ – Neil Diamond & Barbra Streisand (1978)
12. ‘I Want It That Way’ – Backstreet Boys (1999)
11. ‘Hello’ – Lionel Richie (1984)
10. ‘Fix You’ – Coldplay (2005)
9. ‘If’ – Bread (1971)
8. ‘Do You Really Want to Hurt Me’ – Culture Club (1983)
7. ‘What’s Left of Me’ – Nick Lachey (2006)
6. ‘Longer’ – Dan Fogelberg (1979)
5. ‘Every Rose Has Its Thorn’ – Poison (1988)
4. ‘You’re Beautiful’ – James Blunt (2005)
3. ‘Ben’ – Michael Jackson (1972)
2. ‘Sometimes When We Touch’ – Dan Hill (1997) [I think they mean 1977.]
1. ‘Shiny Happy People’ – R.E.M. (1991)

True, R.E.M. disowned the hit, and left it off their Best Of. (“It’s not a terrible song; it’s just irritating to some degree,” Michael Stipe admitted to Blender last year.) But #1? Wrong, wrong, wrong. AOL’s preemptive response? “Let the whining begin!”

Tags: R.E.M.