George Michael Calls Off Wedding

The pop singer and his longtime lover Kenny Goss are now “reassessing their relationship” since news of Michael’s recent hit sex scandal (his first since ’98!).

The best part about George Michael’s mutual fondling with some dude lurking in the bushes in Hampstead Heath? He’s unemployed, 58-year-old Norman Kirtland, and he says ridiculous things.

“I didn’t see who it was. He looked kind of dark and I said to him: You’re not English, are you?”

Nice pick up line.

The Sun claims Kirtland wears “untrendy shorts” and lives in “squalid Brighton flat with a 20-year-old cat.” (Only The Sun would criticize a pet for being old.)

“I don?t even like George Michael?s music,” Kirtland admitted. “I?m not a fan. I prefer soul music myself. I never liked Wham! or any of his stuff.”

How do you not like Wham!? They were whamtastic!

Wham! – “Everything She Wants” (MP3)

At least George has graduated from public restrooms.