American Idol Rejects’ MySpace Pages

We had no intention of watching AI’s season premiere, but because (1) nothing else was on, and (2) were we hoping for a drugged-out Paula Abdul, we surrendered. There were some lovely schadenfreude moments we’ll be keeping an eye out for on YouTube. In the meantime, Eric at Death By Camera has dug up 11 of the idiots who sang for us last night.

Our favorite:

Name: Jason Anderson
Age: 16
MySpace Nickname: The Tekno Kid
You: ?I?ve never been so insulted in my life.? And then you bawled your eyes out.
Why He Sucks: He sang his song while juggling Crystal Stix. I?m completely serious. What the fuck, dude. What?s even worse is that you work at a store called Crystal Stix, and you?re going to internationals for it? Is that even real?

Stick to the sticks Tekno Kid. Singing’s not in your future. (Though a wedgie is.) So many more of last night’s Idolers’ MySpace pages at Check ‘em out.