New Joseph Arthur – “Diamond Ring” (Plus, How To Mooch Smokes)

The new track from singer-songwriter is a classic slice of nostalgia-rock, Joseph’s falsetto cooing “You could be my diamond ring” over bluesy, radio-ready swing. The single comes from Let It Be (out 4/17), the first of two records he’s got slated for ’07. Check it:

Joseph Arthur – “Diamond Ring” (MP3)

Last we checked in with JA, he revealed his sensitive side via MySpace poetry. A sample of his prose then:

Between yer tits / Yer sexy face
Yer runnin legs / To spread and chase
Squirtin cum / Like stars of fire
Hit yer spot / My mushroom sire
My cock so big /My mushroom groove
Trippin kid / On how I move

That was three months ago, and he’s composed a MySpace lyric pretty much every day since. He’s cooled on the cum talk, though. Now it’s poems like “Amen” (teaching you how to pray), “White Shades” (about his white shades), and our favorite, “I’m Smoking A Newport Here’s Why” — a practical guide to bumming a smoke in NYC. If you’re nic-fitting, take his tips after the jump. (Tour dates, too, for the non-smokers.)

“I’m smoking a newport here’s why”

I’m smoking a newport
Here’s why

A flawless approach to bumming cigarettes
On the streets of brooklyn new york
In my neighborhood
There’s a couple of bars
On my block
I been spending my days since nola
Being a good boy and painting
Like a slave
For an idiot gallery owner
Such as myself
To put
My paintings
In his
Bad ass
Museum of modern arthur
But this nasty habit
Of enjoying
A bit of smoke
Into the lungs
Of the pretty voiced me
Has stuck around
Even tho
I been
Sober as a snake
In a jungle
As of late
So me
Not wanting to buy
A ridiculous pack of smokes
Of which
My addictive dumb ass self
Would simply
Huff and huff
I instead employ
My near perfect vehicle
For bumming
These little devices of death
Called coffin nails
Approach said smoker
Like a minx
With a bone in yer hand
And say
Could I dear sir or madmoiselle buy a cigarette off you for a buck
Nine time out of ten
They will simply offer you
One of theirs for nothing
At which point
You surrender to their will
As it is perfectly in allience to your own
And walk off happily
To enjoy your new found
Smoke
In the privacy of your sanctuary
It helps
If you are like me
And enjoy a menthol
As much as any other kind
This method
Is so good because you approach the person you want something from with an offering
As opposed to playing into humanities untrusting nature
Of can I have something from you
Their defenses immediately go up
No one wants to be deemed a sucker
They don’t really care about the cigarette or the dollar
What they do care about
Is respect
And when you
Approach them with an offering
You are giving a sure sign of respect and dignity
Even tho
You are now in the nitty gritty
Of begging
For some kinda
Titty

It works
Everytime

But I still gotta quit
The middle ground
Don’t work
And the devil
Just loves it
When you’re in some kind of middle
Cause what that usually means
Is
You’ll wind up
At his house

While you ruminate on that one, we’ll tell ya where you can see Joseph’s perfect vehicle of a voice live:

04/15 – Montreal @ La Tulipe
04/17 ? Philadelphia @ Theatre of Living Arts
04/18 ? Cambridge @ Middle East
04/19 ? Brooklyn @ Southpaw
04/20 ? Hoboken @ Maxwell’s
04/21 ? Baltimore @ Sonar Club Stage
04/22 ? Cleveland @ Beachland Ballroom
04/23 – Millvale (Pittsburgh) @ Mr. Small’s Theatre
04/24 ? Cincinnati @ 20th Century Theatre
04/25 ? Chicago @ Double Door
04/26 ? Madison @ High Noon Saloon
04/27 ? Minneapolis @ Varsity Theater
04/29 ? Denver @ Larimer Lounge
05/02 ? Seattle @ Neumo’s
05/03 ? Vancouver @ Plaza Club
05/04 ? Portland @ Doug Fir Lounge
05/06 – San Francisco @ Bottom Of The Hill
05/08 – Los Angeles @ Roxy Theatre
05/09 – Los Angeles @ Roxy Theatre
05/11 ? Dallas @ Cambridge Room/HOB
05/12 ? Austin @ The Parish
05/13 ? Houston @ The Engine Room
05/14 – New Orleans @ One Eyed Jacks
05/16 ? Birmingham @ Zydeco
05/17 ? Atlanta @ Smith’s Olde Bar
05/18 ? Athens @ 40 Watt Club
05/19 ? Nashville @ Exit/In
05/20 ? Akron @ Lime Spider
05/21 – Washington, DC @ 9:30 Club
05/23 – New York, NY @ Bowery Ballroom
05/25 ? Toronto @ Mod Club