No Depression’s Swanky SXSW Party For Douchebags

UPDATE: No Depression says the press release we credited to The Daily Swarm was a hoax that originated on a Yahoo! message-board. We apologize for propagating the rumor: there is no dress code at this SXSW party. According to the Austin American-Statesman, the upscale, safari-themed ultra-lounge does offer “posse-friendly ‘bottle service’ to reserve a table’s supply of liquor or wine, and DJ house music designed to turn a night out into an infamous party by closing time.” So playas may still want to check it out.

Hey, SXSWers! What’s more depressing than No Depression’s print publication folding? Try this:

This SxSW annouces the arrival of Pangaea as Austin’s best venue! Since opening in fall 2007, Pangaea has been the first and only place in Austin to really party! Now Pangaea will teach Austin how to party with class at a live music venue! Pangaea is a full bottle service club, you can reserve a table and bottle for an average $300 per bottle. Order an expensive bottle and it will be brought out with a sparkler (so that everyone sees and knows you’re a player). Here’s the inaugural SxSW lineup:

Pangaea (409 Colorado St) (21+ & Dress Code Enforced)
No Depression Night
Bruce Robison 9:00 p.m. Austin TX Country
Bonnie Bramlett 10:00 p.m. Nashville TN R&B
Daniel Lanois 11:00 p.m. Toronto ON Singer-Songwriter
Blue Mountain 12:00 a.m. Oxford MS Alt Country
The Felice Brothers 1:00 a.m. The Catskills NY Alt Country

All badge holders are welcome, but please note dress code is strictly enforced. (Hint: no broke people in t-shirts or dirty converse please!)

Unnecessary “Hint,” Pangaea. What self-respecting playa would be caught dead getting his bottles-and-sparklers drink on in t-shirts and dirty converse?

This is gonna be the best SXSW ever. More depression at The Daily Swarm.