Extreme Britney Makeover: Home Edition

The newlyweds hit Shabby Chic, a home furnishings store in Malibu. Britney Zone reports…

Spears seemed to be pleading to convince Federline to let her purchase some of the feminine, flowery sofas, while her hubby seemed unconvinced. But they appeared to have worked out a deal — afterward the couple went to Circuit City, apparently to buy some toys for Kevin.

Britney: Do you like this basket y’all? I think it’s for holding Kaballah books.
Kevin: I think it’s gay.
Britney: Well I’m paying for it! You don’t get a say. Carp assum.
Kevin: Fine, but you gotta buy me a new plasma screen. And it’s pronounced carp-ay, babe.
Britney: You’re so smart sweetie. I’m hungry. Let’s go to White Castle.
Kevin: Those burgers fuck up your complexion. Remember what your determatologizzist said?
Britney: Hush y’all or I’m taking you off the payroll! Just kidding. You got PUNK’D.
Kevin: Hey, where’s Kori at? Wasn’t she with us when we came in?
Britney: Who?

Rumors are surfacing that the “real” Britney & Kevin wedding is happening Saturday at the Four Seasons in Hawaii. No pimps invited to that one presumably.