VMAs 2013 Comment Party & Drinking Game

It’s that time of year again, when MTV honors its favorite medium — no, not Catfish — the not-all-but-forgotten music video with the Video Music Awards. This year, a grip of Stereogum artists has been nominated for Moonmen, including Daft Punk, Kendrick Lamar, Drake, Vampire Weekend, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, hell, even Taylor Swift. And while we’ll have to wait until next year to celebrate the five year anniversary of her incident with Kanye, there’s no better way to rile up a Comment Party than by getting just as smashed as he was when he grabbed the mic from a then-still-doe-eyed Swift. Kelly from Videogum and I have created a drinking game to help lube your mind to withstand the broadcast from Brooklyn’s Barclays Center and to add fuel to your finger-fire in the comment section. The last thing I would call you, faithful Stereogum commentariat, is shy, but if you’ve ever felt like you needed a little liquid courage to navigate the minefield, we’ve got you more than covered. The rules are simple and bound to encourage plentiful sips throughout the night. You’re legal drinking age, right?

Drink every time…

  • A ridiculous hashtag appears on-screen.
  • You wonder why there isn’t a host.
  • You see Jared Leto.
  • They announce Justin Timberlake is coming.
  • Kanye West disregards the FCC.
  • Someone says “Brookyn.”
  • There is someone purportedly famous whom you do not recognize at all.
  • Someone doesn’t look excited about Macklemore.
  • You catch Drake looking a little sad.
  • Katy Perry and John Mayer are being gross.
  • You want to tell Lady Gaga to take it easy.
  • A celebrity is singing along with a performer and you can tell that they’ve gotten to a part where they don’t really know the lyrics anymore.
  • An older performer makes a surprise appearance and you can feel that a good percentage of the at-home audience probably can’t identify him/her.

Finish your drink if…

  • One of Daft Punk’s helmets falls off by accident.
  • Taylor Swift doesn’t react well to a Taylor Swift joke.
  • Drake’s outfit is totally acceptable.

Drink all of your and everyone else’s booze if…

  • Taylor Swift steals the mic from Kanye.

Bottoms up! Tune in now and join us in the comments below…