Benedict Cumberbatch Has Finally Gone Too Far

[Originally posted on October 31st, 2012.]

Gabe has previously reported numerous accounts of this dangerous sex monster’s attempts at destroying the hearts and vaginas of the world’s female population, but his latest ploy has taken his scheme to an entirely new level of manipulative emotional destruction. As you know, an attractive man holding a newborn baby sets off every hormonal alarm in the female body, throwing it quickly into Uterine-Cardioid Sex Madness. (A heightened level of what the female body goes through after seeing an attractive man holding a small dog.) This image of Benedict Cumberbatch holding his friend Paul McGuigan’s baby, which was later posted it to Paul McGuigan’s Twitter account (an attempt from Cumberbatch to shirk responsibility, one could reasonably guess), can be expected to have this effect on sighted women across the globe. Men, shield your eyes quickly — you are not fully immune. Women, our time has come. As I write this, I am floating into heaven, quickly losing the ability to reach my keyboard. It is a bittersweet end for all of–(Via Celebitchy.)