Videogum

NSFW: Woof, A Porno Based On Dexter

At this point, it’s only weird if there ISN’T a porno based on your favorite TV show. 30 Rock? Yes. Seinfeld? Yes. Cosby Show? Yes. The world is still waiting on a Breaking Bad porno, and a The Wire porno, but I’m sure it’s only a matter of time before those gripping dramas are turned into another thing that is gripping and/or being gripped. (I am so sorry.) Now there is going to be a Dexter porno, called Dexxter*, which is a truly horrific idea. From the very NSFW website PVN (via the Very Work Friendly DailyWhat):

Join sex crime investigator, Dexxxter Whoregan (Nikki Rhodes) as she investigates some of Miami’s sexiest and raunchiest cases. Adult stars Lexi Belle, McKenzie Sweets, Kya Tropic, Lynx and more perform in some steamy scenes in this parody on the Showtime hit, Dexter. Fans of the original show will appreciate the attention to detail, and hardcore porn lovers will surely get off on this hot feature!

Um, someone probably needs to tell the porno industry that there actually is such a thing as a sex crime investigator, and that it’s not super sexy at all. It’s horrible and terrifying and very very sad. But I’m sure that the makers of Dexxxter have found a very steamy way to work murder into their porno. Do you think Dexxxter Whoregan (WHOREGAN!) collects cum from all her victims on slides that she keeps in her DICK CONDITIONER? (I remain eternally so sorry!)

I do love with these things how they always insist that fans of the show who don’t even like porn will still love this. You know, because of the attention to detail. Ha. I’m sure that’s so true!

*I hope there are still a couple of Nobel Clever Names Prizes left!