Kid Rock may be a hateful shitfuck, a stain on the public discourse, but at least he’s dependable. For example, if I were to tell you that Kid Rock is planning to open a bar on Lower Broadway in Nashville, you would probably be immediately be able to figure out all the relevant facts of the story. You would already guess that he’s planning to call the bar Kid Rock’s Big Ass Honky Tonk Rock N’ Roll Steakhouse. And you would also guess that he wants a giant neon sign shaped like a guitar that is also shaped like a woman’s butt.
The Tennesseean reports that Nashville’s Metro Council, after some debate, recently voted 27-3, with three council members abstaining, to allow for the construction and installation of the sign. Nashville mayor David Briley signed the council resolution. So Kid Rock is getting his guitar-butt sign, and his right to have his guitar-butt sign has been written into Nashville law. The Tennesseean describes the sign thus: “The base of the instrument is intentionally shaped like a woman’s buttocks.”
This sign was the subject of some debate within the council. Councilwoman Kathleen Murphy, one of the dissenting voters, says, “We’ve worked very hard as a city to become somewhere that is a tourist destination, an ‘It City,’ somewhere that is family friendly… This one I feel crosses the line between good taste, family-friendliness, and I think what we would like Nashville to portray to people who come to visit us. If we allow this, what is going to come next? I think we can all use our imaginations there.” Other council members didn’t much love the sign, but they worried that Kid Rock would be able to make a First Amendment challenge if they didn’t OK the sign.
Last month, it probably bears mentioning, Kid Rock was supposed to lead Nashville’s Christmas parade, but he was kicked out of the spot after calling Joy Behar a bitch live on Fox & Friends.
Hey, remember when Kid Rock made a great album? Get in the pit! Try to love someone!