Jack White Has Questions About The Marshmallows In Snoop Dogg’s New Breakfast Cereal

David James Swanson

Jack White Has Questions About The Marshmallows In Snoop Dogg’s New Breakfast Cereal

David James Swanson

For many years, a basic distrust of the internet was a core component of Jack White’s public persona. No more. Now, Jack White is out here making dad jokes on Instagram. For instance, Snoop Dogg apparently has a new breakfast cereal called Snoop Loopz. The Snoop Loopz box has a dog on it, though Snoop Dogg himself isn’t on there. The box also promises “more marshmallows,” and Jack White would like to know: More marshmallows than what?

On Instagram yesterday, Jack White posted a couple of images of the Snoop Loopz cereal box, and he wrote the following as a caption:

I would like to personally congratulate Snoop Dogg on his new cereal release and a pat on the back for its charitable benefits that it will be producing, nice one. But i do have a couple of important questions about the box that the cereal is delivered to customers in; in the press release from Broadus foods, the photo of the cereal box contains the words “MORE MARSHMALLOWS”. More than what? if this is in fact a brand new cereal, it can’t be more marshmallows than “before”. Is it a statement that this cereal has more marshmallows than say…a bag of sand, or a typical caesar salad? Or, is it a DEMAND from Snoop Dogg himself that we just have more marshmallows in this world in general? That last theory is my hope. Lastly, the photograph on Master P’s instagram shows a DIFFERENT phrase, an un-plural “MORE MARSHMALLOW” without the “S”. Photo attached, answers demanded.

For many of us, this is the first we’ve heard of the existence of Snoop Loopz. A few days ago, Master P, the man who once signed Snoop to No Limit Records, made some big promises about Snoop Loopz.

Jack White, who is not a journalist, quotes the press release about Snoop Loopz, but we at Stereogum got no such press release, and we can find no evidence of its existence. It’s not entirely clear when, or even if, Snoop Loopz will be available for consumption. Snoop’s company Broadus Foods appears to be a new thing, too. There are websites for a few associated companies and products — Snoop Loopz, Broadus Foods, and Momma Snoop Brand — but they are all full of stock images and typos. Master P is, however, selling Master Crunch Cereal, a commercially available product, so perhaps Snoop Loopz will one day appear in your local grocery store. Maybe Jack White’s post will help with that.

I have a few questions of my own. For instance: Why are they spelling Snoop Loopz with a Z? Nobody pronounces the word “loops” with a Z sound. Is this simply a legal thing, so that Kellogg’s doesn’t sue over the similarity to Froot Loops? Also, the cereal in the picture just kind of looks like Froot Loops. Where are the marshmallows? I see no marshmallows. Maybe Jack White simply appreciates the mysterious nature of this product.

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