Skip to Content
Videogum

Dear Fat Spider-Man, You Are An Adult! Love, This Girl.

We're all just trying to get through the day, which is a truth that I recognize and respect. And for the most part I believe that everyone deserves the basic human decency of being left to their own devices. If this full-grown, slightly overweight ADULT wants to dress up like Spider-Man and strike sassy poses in the town square, then more great power (and great responsibility, I guess) to him. But he also needs to recognize that it is other people's self-actualized right to act the supervillain, and straight DEFEAT him with a bag of bird crumbs tossed in a tight circle around him, ensnaring him in a web of pigeons. Muwahaha, etc.

[videoembed size="full_width" alignment="center"][/videoembed]

If I had a superpower it would be to get that girl to marry me. (BigStupidIdiot via GorillaMask.)

GET THE STEREOGUM DIGEST

The week's most important music stories and least important music memes.