Earlier this week, the Comedy Central Insider wrote a post in reaction to the news that Russell Crowe is considering playing comedian Bill Hicks in a biopic about the late stand up's life and times. The post was a list of seven actors they thought could do a better job than Crowe of bringing Hicks's life to life, including Philip Seymour Hoffman and Paul Giammati. Fair enough. But there are plenty of actors who would do a terrible job.
7 of them after the jump.
Roberto Benigni
Pros: He's funny.
Cons: He's Italian. Like super Italian.
Wesley Snipes
Pros: None.
Cons: America is too racist for a black Bill Hicks.
Orlando Bloom
Pros: Pretty.
Cons: Bill Hicks wasn't pretty.
Sir Ian McKellen
Pros: Great actor.
Cons: He won't be able to lose himself as Hicks. It will just be like, "Why is Gandalf doing angry stand up?"
Owen Wilson
Pros: Laid back.
Cons: Laid back.
Mickey Rourke
Pros: None.
Cons: Prison face.
Dakota Fanning
Pros: Available to work.
Cons: Terrible at her job.
I think you can agree that none of these people should play Bill Hicks.
