No thanks. I think I'll skip this movie, along with all the others, and simply stay home this summer to read a few good books.
(this comment sponsored by Barnes and Noble)
"I am not real Saddam. The real Saddam Hussein has a scar on his forehead. I am no scar. I am no scar. Dot com"
http://i242.photobucket.com/albums/ff185/Deebs2288/saddam.jpg
I bet in this version, when they wiggle their fingers and make air guitar gestures, the soundtrack just plays the "sad trombone" sound from the Price is Right.
As we speak, Charlie Sheen is developing a syndicated talk show called, "Cocaine Chat."
"So Lindsey, what do you think of as an 'effervescent' snort?"
"Oh, I would half to go with the '09 Bolivia crop. Full bodied aroma, without a hint of pretension."
"Farewell and adieu, to you fair late night comic.
Farewell and adieu, you comic of shorts.
For we've received orders to stunt cast our shark week.
Perhaps Lorne Michaels shall see you no more."
Sure he looks smooth now. But when he inevitably dangles a fake severed toe between those paintings just to make stupid "Tiptoe Through The Two-Lips" joke, the effect is going to be ruined.
If you think that joke is too old, then it's a good thing I didn't go with my first impulse:
http://i242.photobucket.com/albums/ff185/Deebs2288/clara.jpg
“WITCH BITCH PUMMELLED BY PATTY” – The MunchkinLand Post
“BURGER THAT KILLED WITCH PILOTED BY MUTANT ALIENS?” – The Munchkinland Enquirer
“KIND, WEALTHY WITCH MURDERED – LIBERAL BURGER BIZ TO BLAME?” – MunchkinFox News
"Why is this night different from all other nights?"
"Because tonight your bread is being used for masterbation by a walking 80's B movie. Now shut up and eat your kugel"
"I hate people! All of them! With their stupid 'friends' and their 'well lit apartments' and their 'full bowls of cereal.' I know. I'll download some more illegal movies. That'll show 'em!"
http://i242.photobucket.com/albums/ff185/Deebs2288/dude.png
http://i242.photobucket.com/albums/ff185/Deebs2288/dvd.jpg
This is also the reaction he had when he watched the "Schindler's List," "Sophie's Choice," and "Hotel Rwanda" DVD's.
"So YOU'RE the one who left me that note saying, 'buy every kind of mustard."
"And you still didn't get the kind I like! The red kind, that says "ketchup" on the label."
"Sean Penn wanted me to go to Haiti with him, and I'm not strong enough for the pain and human misery of a 3 hour plane ride with Sean Penn"
I need to find a way to work this line into my everyday conversation. I MUST.
No, no, it's all in good fun. Just friendly debate for yuks.
All my upvotes to you facetaco. Which I can offer, 'cause I'm on a mac. I hear upvotes crash PC's. KIDDING.
Oh yeah, your way totally works too. One button instead of three is definitely less buttons. And hey, after your PC locks you up with a blue error screen message, you can use that reboot time to work on your novel!
(I actually know squat-all about computers. But I do enjoy arguing about things!)
A comment in a comment in a comment. "Commentation." BRAHHHHHHHHHM
(Baby Friday: to make a screen cap on a mac, press "shift" + "command" + "3." If you don't have a mac, simply buy a mac, then press "shift" + "command" + "3.")
Rebecca Black on Glee? Cool. Now I need Gwyneth Paltrow to be the guest star who sings it, while Bangs provides the backing vocals, and I'll hit Videogum Bingo.
Agreed. It's just a corporate brand. There's absolutely no sense in aligning yourself with a company that you are not a part of and has no bearing on your life.
On an unrelated note, GO COWBOYS. WHOOOOOOO.
Today's ESPN top story: "The Hammer is My Penis" places an embarrassing third in the "Race to Make a Bear/Raccoon Hat Joke" Videogum semifinals.
In other sports news, Wichita bested Sioux City in an epic clash of Kronum titans..."
Dear Girl Standing Behind this Awesome Kid:
Stop looking all askance at him like that. He totally makes those glasses and the funny dance work for him. Your raccoon hat on the other hand...
Okay FLW. You win this round.
But how about the homemade legal mystery/thriller I shot in my basement last year with my Flip camera, using nothing but lego sets and my son's hamsters as the stars. Good luck linking THAT to Kevin Bacon.
Wait, no, Michael Caine is in it. Shit.
And everyone involved was amateurs? No Hollywood pros at all?
So ironically, the "Footloose" remake is the only film in existence that cannot be linked to Kevin Bacon via any number of degrees.
Well, Ashton's first rule of Newtonian physics states that the number of Newtons you can fit into your mouth is M+W/X where M=mouth capacity, W=width of Newton, and X=the size of the glass of milk that you plan to chase it with.
http://i242.photobucket.com/albums/ff185/Deebs2288/fig.jpg
Comments