How can you remember this? I spent five minutes the other day trying to remember what kind of car I had in high school. Oh man... Medical marijuana = NOT REAL MEDICINE.
I just had 3 shells installed in my bathroom ala Demolition Man
http://www.poopreport.com/Images/3shells.jpg
they look great .. but.. fucking three shells, how does it work?
Definitely keeping the pooch and commencing my Jameson transfusion shortly. What's strange is that I can tell all of this to you guys now but I'm still too blubbery and weird to let my non-interwebs friends know. Anyway, called in sick for the rest of the week and probably going to get all 'Jason Segel in Hawaii' for a little bit, but I'll live.
Just me and this guy now. And so it goes.
http://www2.snapfish.com/snapfish/thumbnailshare/AlbumID=4734879009/a=45875260_45875260/otsc=SHR/otsi=SALBlink/COBRAND_NAME=snapfish/
Spoiler Alert: You will meet a girl, fall in lover with her, move in with her, get a dog, live together for three years, plan on marrying her and then she will inexplicably dump you on August 23rd.
I wish I would have gotten that fucking spoiler alert. #bittergum
I hate these, like, meta-commercials - last week it was Breyer's and this week Suave. That makes two consecutive weeks I've been tricked into stopping my commercial fast-forwarding because goddamn scenery similarities. When is it going to stop/how can I express my anger? I'm going to remember these products the way I remember chlamydia and cooking bacon without a shirt on (bad things) and avoid them* from now on!
* Full disclosure: I steal my girlfriend's Aveda in the shower and I'm lactose intolerant BUT STILL
That reminds me, I think I have a couple Vicodin rattling around in my medicine cabinet. Rad.
This is the second useful thing that Entourage has done for me, the first was providing an effective douchebag detector, ala, "Hey, brah, did you see Entourage last week? (brah?)"
Nothing really says "bro-ing down" like chugging Scotch, going out to a semi-romantic dinner, blacking out, slapping some steak around, watching Godzilla and picking up some whores.
Going out for a couple IPAs with the guys I work with seems so lame now because Draper.
I think old Simon here might have a couple emergency Cinnabons stashed under his t-shirt.
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_WSIWExR72CM/SHmp8BmcAbI/AAAAAAAAAHg/N0H7qYerbYQ/s400/moobs_simon.jpg
No wonder he looks so content.
Aw, come on guys. If you were rocking some rad J Lo shades like old Piv over here, you would be too nervous to bend over a toilet to retrieve your phone too.
hole in the ocean you say?
http://i196.photobucket.com/albums/aa21/oldbeatlechick/Beatles5-1.jpg
these dudes are fixing it & trying to make a dove-tail joint (yeah)
The worst part for me is that it requires you to suspend disbelief to the extent that you are willing to accept that Jack Black can do a fucking CARTWHEEL.
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